Missing Moments
by PJ Blindclown
Summary: Lief and Jasmine really did kiss in the novels, we just had to use our imaginations to figure out when. Here are my interpretations of those missing moments.
1. Feeling Brave

Disclaimer: I don't own Deltora quest, it belongs to Emily Rodda. However, I am using scenes from the books as reference points.

Feeling Brave

The palace bells were ringing, but neither Lief nor Jasmine could hear them. Both were consumed by thoughts of all that had happened in the underground caverns, and later in the Shadowlands.

Jasmine still could not believe how easily she had been fooled. How easily the Shadow lord had tricked her into believing that she had a little sister, and that Lief had kept knowledge of "Faith" from her.

And then, Lief had followed her. Followed her, quite literally, to the end of the earth. Jasmine realised now that he had not followed her to beg her to return, but to beg her to forgive him. Even now, neither of them were sure exactly what Lief had said or done that needed to be forgiven.

The crowd was still surging up the hill from the city, and it seemed that all eyes were on the King, and the wild girl who held his hand.

"Lief," Jasmine said, getting his attention. An uncomfortable thought had occurred to her as she felt the eyes of the crowd upon them, but now, she was feeling brave enough to put her thoughts into words. When she saw that she had Lief's full attention, Jasmine continued.

"You say that you will marry for love if I…I mean, She will have you?"

When Lief nodded, Jasmine moved closer to him.

"Look at all the people," she said. "What if they will not have the woman you love as their Queen?"

At this, Lief let go of her hand and put his arm around her, pulling her so close to him that she could hear his heartbeat over the sounds of cheering and bells.

Jasmine would not have thought it possible for her face to become even hotter, but when Lief leaned even closer and whispered to her, she felt as though her face was on fire, and that Lief must surely be able to feel the heat coming from her.

"That would not matter Jasmine," he breathed. "Because I have wanted you for my bride since before I even knew that I would be king."

Now, Lief was also feeling brave. Throwing all caution to the winds, Lief pressed his lips against Jasmine's. And in that moment, Lief realised that if pursuing Jasmine to the Pirran islands would lead to him standing with her in his arms on the palace lawn, surrounded by cheering people, he would do it again in a heartbeat. It had all been worth it.


	2. By His Side

By His Side

Jasmine stood with Kree at the entrance to the forge. She knew that any moment, Lief would come, bringing the shadow lord's crystal with him. He had only requested her Father's presence, but both Jasmine and Doom had known that Lief would need her now. Doom had not even questioned her when she announced that she would be leaving Tora with him, and Sharn had looked relieved.

Lief had not asked his mother to return to Del, and so she would not. Both of them knew that Tora was the best place for Sharn now, and not just because of the crystal.

The Torans had been most disappointed that Lief had not travelled there to attend Marilen and Ranesh's wedding. They had been deeply offended that Lief had asked Marilen to travel to Del, only to leave her the next day, but that Lief himself would not travel to Tora for the marriage of his heir.

Marilen and Ranesh had understood completely. Lief had written a long letter to Marilen explaining that he could not leave the people of Del without the belt's protection, and between them they had decided that Jasmine, Sharn and Doom would attend in his place.

But now, Doom was working the bellows of the forge, as he had done to earn his living long ago, and Jasmine was looking toward the road. Kree saw Lief and the guards first, and as they had planned, he called to Doom to tell him that they were coming.

Lief looked awful. It was clear that the evil power of the crystal was taking a toll on him, but he did not stop. Pushing the forge gates fully open to allow everyone to pass through, Jasmine ran toward Lief and embraced him. He could hardly hold himself upright, and so Jasmine supported him as they moved together into the forge. She snapped at him when he tried to push her away, knowing that he was doing it out of some foolish need to protect her, when in it was clear that he was the one who needed protecting now.

As they drew closer to the fire, Jasmine reached up and kissed him, hoping somehow that that gesture would give him strength.

Barda saw Lief's face regain a little colour when Jasmine kissed him, and he was glad that she had come with Doom. Barda knew better than anyone, even Lief himself, that Lief would always need Jasmine by his side. Perhaps when they were rid of this accursed crystal, he would do something about it and marry her.


	3. Through the Window

Through the Window

Barda stood with Lindal in the great hall of Broome, trying not to think about his impending journey. He knew he had to leave Broome with Lief and Jasmine at dawn, but for the first time, Barda found that he did not want to go. All Lief's life, Barda had protected him, and for all that time, he had told himself that he had done it out of love for his late Mother, who had been Jarred and Endon's nursemaid, and had died when she had tried to warn Endon about the shadow lord's invasion. He even laughed sometimes, when he thought of how fitting it was that he now travelled the kingdom with both their children. But now, he faced the truth, that he had protected the boy (who he later learned to be the young king) because he had felt that no one else needed him. Until now.

Barda and Lindal had danced all night, and had been together for ten days before that, and now that he, Lief and Jasmine were to travel north, to the place called Shadowgate, Barda found that he did not want to leave her.

"Cheer up, Old Bear," Lindal said, noticing his frown. When he did not respond, she pointed toward the window that looked out onto the veranda. "Look," she said with a smile.

Lief and Jasmine were standing there, hand in hand. In Lief's other hand, Barda could see that Lief was holding a paper. Then Jasmine said something to him, and Lief looked up into her face. Barda was beginning to realise that this might just be one of those (increasingly frequent) moments between his two young companions that he should not witness, but still, he did not look away. As Lief spoke to Jasmine, Barda remembered that Lindal was also watching the couple on the veranda.

"Sometimes, when they are like this, I feel they no longer need me," Barda told Lindal quietly.

"And there you are wrong, Old Bear," Lindal said. "I dare say it was you who stopped them from killing each other before they realised how they felt. They should thank you."

Barda smiled, as he noticed Lief and Jasmine moving closer to one another. As their lips met, Lindal nudged him.

"We should go out there," she said. "Before someone else sees them and gossip starts to spread."

Barda nodded, and followed Lindal toward the door. It seemed that at least for now, Lief and Jasmine still needed him.


	4. Pain

Pain

The caravan was covered with bees. The sound of their humming was coming from everywhere. They were moving at a speed that was beyond anything that Lief and Jasmine had ever experienced. But as they raced through the countryside, neither of them was able to marvel at how fast they were going. In both their minds, was the memory of the previous night's events.

Slowly, the memory of Jasmine saving him from having the mask of Bede's adulthood bonded to his face for the rest of his life and beyond was returning to Lief in scraps; that still seemed not to want to be fitted together to form an exact mental image of what had happened. But in a way, Lief was glad of that. The parts that he could remember were enough to make him sick to his stomach.

"Lief," Jasmine was kneeling on the trembling floor boards in front of him, her jar of green ointment in her hand.

"You need to let me put some more of this on your face," she said softly. "It will help to reduce scarring, as well as helping with the… Lief, what is the matter?"

Lief was shrinking away from her, shaking his head and trying to back himself against the caravan wall. Jasmine could not understand why. Certainly he was in pain, but surely he was not going back to the way he had been the night before. If he was, Jasmine did not know what she would do.

"No, thank you," he said, his voice cracking slightly. Plainly, his throat was still sore from screaming. Jasmine could not help but feel relieved that he was not going to start again. Having Lief shouting obscenities and abuse at her in the field in Happy Vale had been one thing, but if he were to start again in this speeding caravan from which there was no escape, it would be something else entirely.

"You need to let me put some more of this on your face," Jasmine repeated. Again, Lief shook his head.

From Lief's expression, Jasmine could see that the pain he was in was still severe, though it seemed that he still had some control over his mind. She tried again.

"Lief," she said gently, moving toward him as though he was a wounded animal that might attack her at any moment. "Please let me put this on your face. You will feel better, I promise."

Jasmine unscrewed the lid of the jar and scooped a portion of the sticky green ointment onto her hands, rubbing it between them. As she reached up to smooth it onto his face, Lief suddenly threw his arms around her, holding her to him. He held her so tightly that it hurt her a little, but still, she did not pull away from him.

As Jasmine smoothed the ointment on his face, Lief finally looked at her properly. Whenever Jasmine looked at Lief closely, she wondered how it was that Lief's eyes were the same colour as the Lapis Lazuli in the Belt of Deltora. But now, she felt no such thing. The half-mad look in his eyes was frightening her.

Jasmine," He said, his voice a harsh croak that did not suit him.

"I will let you go back, back to the forests. \You can be free. I will let you go…" He stopped there, his eyes filling with tears.

Jasmine finished applying the ointment, and put the lid back onto the jar. As she returned Lief's embrace, the jar dropped to the caravan floor with a soft clattering sound.

"What are you talking about, Lief?" Jasmine asked him. "You have said before that when all this is over, that we would be married if we survive."

"No," Lief rasped. "We cannot be married now, my face, and the things I said to you last night…"

Jasmine pressed her mouth against Lief's, effectively smothering his argument. She had done this before, but this time, it was different. For one thing, Lief did not return the kiss. He seemed frozen, perhaps with shock, perhaps with pain. Slowly, Jasmine felt Lief's body relax, and when he closed his eyes, she felt relieved that she would no longer have to see the madness that the pain was driving him to.

"It will be alright," Jasmine told him as she broke the kiss. "We will find Laughing Jack, Zerry, and the belt, then we will continue north to Shadowgate…"

But Jasmine stopped there, as she felt Lief's mouth against her own for the second time in as many moments. She almost wanted to pull away herself, to finish what she had been saying to him. That as far as she was concerned, Lief could have her for his bride, whatever he looked like, that she would never run away to the forests, not from him. But she supposed that now, she did not need to, for Lief had opened his eyes again, and the half-mad look had gone from them. Jasmine had been right; her green ointment had eased Lief's pain. Now, all there was to do was hope that the speed at which they were moving would be enough for them to catch up with Laughing Jack.


	5. Freedom

Freedom

When she found herself standing on the hard, flat rock, she had no idea how this had come to be. At first, she had thought that she was dead, because the sudden exposure to the air hurt her eyes. But then, she realized that along with the fresh air that blew on her face, there was dust falling all around her. She blinked and coughed, then looked around again, and what she saw made her eyes fill with tears. Now, she was almost certain that death had indeed come for her at last.

He was lying there, not far from where she stood. There were two others with him. One appeared to be a big man, and the other, a girl with long, dark curls that moved about her face in the breeze. All three of them stood up quickly, looking toward the sky. When she followed their gaze, she felt her mouth drop open.

Something huge was hovering there. As she watched, it lowered itself a little, and then dropped something right near where he and the others were standing. With horror, she realised that it was a human being, a young man, and he was falling like a stone. As soon as he hit the ground, the girl with the dark hair fell to her knees beside him. It was then, when the other two were focused on the newcomer, that he joined her.

"He will be alright," he said as he took her hand. "I do not think he fell too far."

"Bede!" She exclaimed, hardly daring to believe it. "Are we both dead then?"

"No," He said, his face splitting into the smile that she had fallen in love with all those long years ago. "We are free. Can you not see it, Mariette? This is where Kirsten's castle was."

"I do not remember," she said softly. "I was too tired to look around when we came here. But Kirsten… Is she?"

For reasons that she could not explain, Mariette was unable to finish her sentence. Despite all that Kirsten had done to them, there had still been that flicker of hope within her that Kirsten would turn from the shadows. They were sisters, after all.

"Yes," Bede said softly. "I think… I think that is why we were freed. When she died, all her magic came undone."

"Who is he?" Mariette asked, pointing at the young man who had fallen to the ground. From where she stood with Bede, Mariette could see that he had woken.

"He is the king," Bede whispered. "King Lief, I think that is his name, he understood the message in my song, and tried to free us both, even before Kirsten died."

As they watched, the girl embraced him, and then a few moments later, the two of them shared a kiss that reminded Mariette of that month that the masked ones had spent in Shadowgate, when she had fallen in love with Bede. And as the king raised himself, she saw why.

"Bede, he looks like you!" Mariette told him. "Why, you could be brothers!"


	6. Nights of Nothing

Nights of Nothing

Jasmine lay alone in her Toran bedchamber. The room was cool, white and bare, but Marilen and Ranesh had done everything they could to make the room welcoming for her. Even so, it was not enough, and they all knew it.

The room was not the only thing that was cold and empty. Jasmine had been trying for nine nights now to find Lief in her dreams, with no result. The dreaming water the kin had given them had nearly run out, and Jasmine knew that once it did, there would be little to no hope of finding him. They had just finished searching for Lief and Barda, only to find nothing again, and now was the time that Jasmine was coming to dread; the time when she would drink the water, think of him, and dream of nothing. Tonight, she drank less than she had before, in case she needed more later.

As she lay there in the dark, Jasmine found herself wondering, as she had for the previous nine nights, how life would be without Lief, and to a lesser extent Barda. What would become of her?

At first, Jasmine had believed that if her two companions could not be found, that she would go back to the forests. But in the past few days, she had come to realise that the loneliness she was experiencing now would be nothing compared to the life she had previously lived. Although the trees and animals who had surrounded her in the forest had been safe and friendly, Jasmine had always felt a deep sense of longing for human company. When she had found Lief and Barda lying helpless on the forest floor, she had wanted so desperately for them to be grey guards, because she could not comprehend that the very thing for which she had hoped for so long had actually come to pass. She realised now, that even if her mother's spirit had not come to her and told her to join Lief and Barda's quest, that she might just have gone with them anyway, for the companionship if nothing else.

But now, Lief and Barda, who had made her feel that her life was worthwhile, who had shown her that hoping was not just for fools, might truly have drowned beneath those storm tossed waves. But still, Jasmine hoped, and tried with all her might to dream. But even she was starting to believe that such hopes could come to pass only once.

When she finally fell asleep, Jasmine immediately began to dream. She was standing by the ocean, in a place where sand dunes seemed to be mimicking the waves with their shape, as if nature was in competition with itself. Jasmine was almost afraid to look around, believing that she had been lead to Lief's body, rather than Lief himself. But there he was. He was lying on the shore with Barda, surrounded by seaweed and shells. At first, she thought that he was indeed dead, but when she bent over him, she saw that his chest was rising and falling slowly. He was asleep.

Although she knew in her heart that Lief would feel and hear nothing, she began to shake him and call his name. But he did not wake. She did, however, and when she opened her eyes, she realised that they had filled with tears.

Jasmine got out of bed quickly, and ran to the chamber where Zeean slept.

"Zeean!" She called as she knocked on the door. "I have found him! He is alive! You must come, you must take me…" Jasmine broke off as Zeean opened the door, and she saw the look on the older woman's face. It was not a relieved look, but a pitying one.

"Jasmine," Zeean said softly. "I know that you have tried so hard, but I think now is the time to accept that your heart might be allowing you to dream things that are what you wish for, rather than the truth. Did you not tell me that there was not much dreaming water left?"

"Yes," Jasmine said, becoming angry. "But he was there, he was alive, I saw him. I promise you, he was there… He was lying on a shore, where sand dunes were rising like the waves. We must go to him, he will not have eaten for ten days, and he was deeply asleep, and…" Jasmine found that she could say no more. The idea that Lief might have little time left was too much for her to bear.

"The sleeping dunes," Zeean whispered.

"You know the place?" Jasmine asked. "Then we must go there!"

"I will wake Marilen," Zeean said briskly. "Wait here for me."

Moments later, Marilen, Ranesh and Manus joined them, and then, Toran magic was speeding them to the place where Lief and Barda were believed to be.

As soon as she saw him, Jasmine began calling to him, and she could faintly hear his voice answering her, and before she knew it, she was in his arms.

"Lief!" She shrieked. "How could you do this to me? I had nine nights of nothing!"

Lief smothered her words with his own mouth, and this time, it was different. The kiss was rougher, more urgent. It made Jasmine feel things that she had not experienced before. Then she laughed as she realised that her hopes had come to pass once again.


	7. One Moment Longer

One Moment Longer

They stood there, in the square in the centre of Tora. None of them able to take in what they had just heard. Not only was the sister of the south hidden somewhere in Del, but now Sharn was suffering from a grave illness, which had already taken many of Del's citizens.

Marilen could see the suffering on Lief's face, and knew that he was struggling to hold himself together. She and Ranesh quickly dismissed themselves with the excuse that they should fetch food, in case Lief's emotions got the better of him. Marilen knew better than anyone that Lief would not want to be seen coming apart just now. Especially not by anyone in Tora, where he was held in such high regard.

As she and Ranesh made their way to the dining hall, Marilen glanced back, and what she saw made the situation seem even worse.

Jasmine's arm was still around Lief, and Marilen could see the effort he was making to hold back tears. Perhaps it had something to do with the fact that she was related to him, but Marilen felt that she would never understand Lief. Surely, it would be easier to just let it all out. Even in Tora, such strong emotions simply could not be restrained.

Just as Marilen was about to look away, she saw Jasmine softly press her lips against Lief's. But just as quickly, they pulled away from one another, and Marilen saw Lief opening one of the letters that Zeean had given him. No doubt, it held more bad news. But as Marilen continued to walk, she could see by the way they both moved that they had wanted to hold onto one another for one moment longer.

Lief had told Marilen about his love for Jasmine when they had first met. Marilen had made it her business to learn as much about Lief as possible, if she was to be his heir. Since then, Marilen had wondered why they had not married, or openly expressed any desire for something more than a friendship before now. They had certainly known one another for long enough. She and Ranesh had not known one another for half as long, and they were already married and expecting a child.

But now, Marilen understood that that neither of them had dared to even want for such a relationship, because for them, such attachments were dangerous. Lief had grown up as one of Del's many street children, and Jasmine had grown up in the Forests of Silence. Both the forests and the streets had their own cruel ways of taring such bonds apart.

As she prepared a platter of food to take out to the three still in the square, Marilen promised herself that when all this was over, when Lief, Barda and Jasmine had finished saving the kingdom, that she would do everything she could to make sure that a time would come when Lief and Jasmine could hold one another for as long as they might wish to, and never, ever be made to let go.


	8. Empty Spaces

Empty Spaces

When it had first been built, the bird room of the palace had been a beautiful place. But as Lief and Jasmine worked together to save the few birds that remained alive, both of them felt that it was beautiful no longer. For a while, they worked in silence. Lief pressing the emerald to the breasts of the birds that had survived the poison, and Jasmine gently placing them onto perches once he had finished.

Suddenly, Lief seized a handful of the straw on the ground, and threw it violently across the room. Jasmine looked at him, alarmed. The surviving birds clucked nervously, perhaps wondering if their saviour might change his mind and kill them after all. He certainly looked angry enough to do so.

"Lief! What is it?" Jasmine asked, very aware of the stir he had caused among the birds. It would not do to have saved them all from death by poisoning, only to have them die of terror only a few moments later.

"Whoever this guardian is," Lief began through clenched teeth. "I am going to make them pay for this, even if it kills me! I will make them wish they never came to this palace, if they are human, I will make them wish they had never been born, and if they happen to be a shadow lord creation; a thing of sorcery, I will make sure that the last sound they make is a curse at their creator."

"But Why?" Jasmine asked him, feeling puzzled and a little afraid. She was not used to Lief behaving like this. Usually, he was the calm one. "Why not just kill the guardian and be done with it?"

As she placed the last living bird back on its perch, Jasmine turned to face Lief. He clasped the belt of Deltora back around his waist and gave her his full attention. Jasmine could see in Lief's eyes that he was certainly angry, but there was another emotion there that she could not quite place. When he took a few steps toward her, she tried to step back, but found that her feet would not move. Lief was frightening her now, and she did not know why.

"What did they do? They had no way of fighting this guardian off. They were all but helpless!"

"They enabled the palace to communicate with the rest of Deltora, that is what they did." Jasmine told him matter-of-factly

"No," Lief said, still with that look in his eyes. "I think it was more than that."

"More than that?" Jasmine asked. Now, she was really confused.

"Can you not see it, Jasmine?" He said. "This guardian knows how hard you worked to train these birds. He knows that the birds were the only reason you stayed in Del after we freed the slaves."

This was not true. The birds certainly made her feel useful, but they had not been the only reason she had stayed. But Lief was still speaking.

"And he knows how I love you. He wants to take all the fight out of me, so that I will have no spirit left when I fight the sister. Poisoning my mother was not enough."

But Jasmine did not hear anything after Lief had told her he loved her. He had never said it like that before. Certainly, she knew how Lief felt about her, they had even spoken of marriage. But until recently, when he had kissed her in the Sleeping Dunes, it had been all blushing and awkwardness, with neither of them really knowing what to say or do. But now, it was different.

Taking a chance, Jasmine moved toward Lief and put her arms around him. He leaned into her embrace and kissed her, and this time, it felt more like the kiss they had shared in the dunes than anything else that Jasmine had ever experienced. Dimly, she remembered all they had to do, but she quickly put the thought out of her mind. If Lief really did think that he was going to die, and that the guardian of the south was working to destroy his spirit, the time they had now might be all that was left for them.


	9. Dying Peacefully

Dying Peacefully

The Toran plague was real. There was no poison. People had removed their masks, exposing themselves to needless infection. Lief found himself wondering whether the sickness he felt was due to the guilt he felt, or because of the plague itself. Despite the fact that such a terrible illness was not how he thought he would die, Lief felt that his own death would bring justice to those who would lose their lives because of his actions.

As Lief contemplated just how he would move the top of the marble platform that he now knew had to be what concealed the hiding place for the sister of the south, he heard Barda's voice. He looked around, and saw him standing there with Jasmine. They had come, as he knew they would, to fight beside him one last time. But this only made him feel a little better. How was he to tell them that they were all dying of the plague? Suddenly, the idea of facing the sister seemed like nothing compared to the anger and blame that he knew Barda and Jasmine would hurl at him as soon as they heard the truth.

But then, Jasmine took his arm, and thanked him for saving her birds. As she softly kissed him, Lief burned the smile she gave him into his memory, so that when the end finally came for him, he could hold the image in his mind until he left this world. The idea of death by illness no longer seemed so cruel. After all, the plague had taken Joseph just recently, and Lief decided that if Joseph could die peacefully after all he had been through, then so could he.


	10. Fighting Together

Fighting together

There was no such thing as "the Toran plague." Lief had been right all along. His mother's lip balm had been poisoned, and that was what had made her sick. She was not going to die. Neither were Lindal, Zeean, and the hundreds of others who could now be saved.

Lief on the other hand, was another story. The dragon needed him, if it were to survive for long enough to destroy the sister of the south. The one that had been spreading poison and misery throughout the territory of the Topaz for centuries. But the dragon of the Topaz had sustained many injuries since it had come to Del, and Lief honestly believed that the battle for Del would be its last. It almost made him sad to know that he might never have gotten to know the dragon of his homeland, but when he thought about it, he realised that this might not be the case. If Veritas, (the dragon of the amethyst) was to be believed, dragons and humans alike dwelled in a place where they could all fly above the wind after they left this world, so perhaps he would get to know the Topaz dragon after all.

Lief was no fool. He knew that once the sister had been destroyed, and the dragon had also died, that he would not live for long afterwards.

And Jasmine was with him.

She had come to be with him, leaving Filli with Barda. Lief knew that Barda would have joined Jasmine, to be with him in this last fight for Deltora if he could, but having recently been blinded when he smashed the warning stone, etched with the words of the shadow lord who had dared to insult his king, he was in no condition to fight. But Jasmine was, and she was here.

Lief knew that Jasmine had not only come to fight with him, but to die with him as well. Once, not too long ago, they had talked, planned and even allowed themselves to dream of the life they could have when all this was over. A life in which there would be love, marriage, and even children. But now, none of that would happen.

It seemed that Lief and Jasmine leaned in and kissed one another at the same time, and as they slid down together to re-join the dragon, Lief made sure that the memory of that kiss was burned into his memory, so that it could be the last thing he thought of as he left this world.

Perhaps there would be no marriage or children, but in its own way, fighting and dying together was just as good.


End file.
